| | Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC |  |
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| How many stars do you give my story out of 5? | | * | | 0% | [ 0 ] | | ** | | 0% | [ 0 ] | | *** | | 25% | [ 1 ] | | **** | | 0% | [ 0 ] | | ***** | | 75% | [ 3 ] |
| | Total Votes : 4 | | | |
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| Author | Message |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
    (800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
 |  Subject: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC  Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:19 pm | |
| Please, if you have anything to say about my story Koriko and please rate it. | |
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Ashley
Moderator
Number of posts : 396
Age : 32
Class : Priest (Reiki?)
Registration date : 2007-11-02
Character sheet
Level: 4
Health:
(400/400)
Mana:
(300/300)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:24 pm | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:27 pm | |
| Thanks, I'm working on becomming a writer and I thought this would be the best place to see people's opinions! | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:29 pm | |
| I might post it on Youtube next! | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:54 pm | |
| What do you think? Think I'll be successful? | |
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Ashley
Moderator
Number of posts : 396
Age : 32
Class : Priest (Reiki?)
Registration date : 2007-11-02
Character sheet
Level: 4
Health:
(400/400)
Mana:
(300/300)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:00 pm | |
| Yeah, just keep writing lol | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:42 pm | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:09 pm | |
| ~Chapters 1 & 2 are complete~ If you are talking about a certain chapter say something like..... - Quote :
- Chapter 1
I liked when Koriko came!! | |
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Ashley
Moderator
Number of posts : 396
Age : 32
Class : Priest (Reiki?)
Registration date : 2007-11-02
Character sheet
Level: 4
Health:
(400/400)
Mana:
(300/300)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:18 pm | |
| Chapter 2
OMG AN OCARINA lawl, see now this is what happens with me and coffee ^^ I still liked Chapter 2 though lolz | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:23 pm | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Fri Jan 18, 2008 3:58 pm | |
| ~Chapter 3 is complete~
[O]Currently working on Chapter 4
[X]Currently working on Chapter 5
[X]Currently working on Chapter 6
[X]Currently working on Chapter 7
[X]Currently working on Chaprer 8 | |
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Demous
Origin of Twilight
Number of posts : 906
Age : 31
Registration date : 2007-10-21
Character sheet
Level: 6
Health:
(1000/1000)
Mana:
(900/900)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:14 pm | |
| Its good but doesnt work ok ill tell you layouts for the sotry chapers every chapter is like a 3 aparagraph essay
Intro
Body
Conclusion
Its very good writing But try to use details to make the stroy interesting
i gave it a three because how small it was and how you lacked details but i liked how your wording and the names of everyone and i like how you are interested in Japanese culture i also am a great fan | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:20 pm | |
| Thank you Demous, I agree, it is not the best in the world, but honestly, these are minimized chapters, I can easily make them longer, but it would require at least a full day on the computer, and I simply don't have enough time | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:22 pm | |
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Guest
Guest
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Fri Jan 18, 2008 6:23 pm | |
| each chapter is not like some 3 parragraph essay and sometimes you can have it really long o0; but I dont think it is like some intro, stuffs, then conclusion, all because it is just a continuation of the last chapter just it could be with some other area (which then I guess you could have the intro) or a turning event/main point like thing. o.o |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Fri Jan 18, 2008 10:17 pm | |
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Guest
Guest
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 12:18 am | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 12:42 am | |
| pwease?  | |
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Guest
Guest
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 1:58 am | |
| but my vote counts as three votes DX |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 10:47 am | |
| Say Whaaaaat?  | |
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Guest
Guest
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 4:36 pm | |
| thats just how hot I am  |
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Ashley
Moderator
Number of posts : 396
Age : 32
Class : Priest (Reiki?)
Registration date : 2007-11-02
Character sheet
Level: 4
Health:
(400/400)
Mana:
(300/300)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 4:43 pm | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 4:46 pm | |
| Hahahahahahhahahhahahhah very funny NOW VOTE | |
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Guest
Guest
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 5:45 pm | |
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Hinoshi
Heroes of Light
Number of posts : 631
Age : 33
Location : Outskirts of Wutai
Class : Guardian
Registration date : 2007-09-19
Character sheet
Level: 5
Health:
(800/800)
Mana:
(500/500)
| | Subject: Re: Koriko - RESPONSE TOPIC Sat Jan 19, 2008 9:58 pm | |
| I would really appreciate it if you...........VOTED RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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